Why Sharing Finances Is the Foundation of a Stronger Relationship

By Nathan Fradley & Jordan Vaka

Hosts of the Weaving Gold Podcast

We see it all the time: one partner handles the money, and the other... doesn’t. It starts off innocently—dividing roles, managing time, avoiding double-handling. But over time, financial imbalance becomes financial distance. And eventually, distance can turn into disconnection.

In our very first episode of Weaving Gold, we talk about something that’s at the heart of so many relationship breakdowns—not money itself, but the lack of shared understanding around it.

“The No Person” and the Financial Disconnect

You know "The No Person"—the one in the relationship who says things like,

“We can’t afford that.”“Now’s not the time.”“Why did you spend so much?”

It’s not always about control. More often, it’s about stress, shame, and not knowing how to share the load. When one partner carries the full mental and emotional burden of managing money, it becomes isolating—for both people.

We’ve worked with many couples where one person hasn’t looked at a bill, a bank account, or a super statement in years. Not because they’re careless, but because it simply wasn’t their “job.” But when circumstances change—retirement, illness, divorce, death—that knowledge gap turns into a panic.

Why Financial Transparency Matters

Every couple has a division of labour. But you both still need to know how the washing machine works—even if only one of you usually does the laundry. Finances should be the same.

Here’s why shared financial knowledge matters:

• It reduces resentment and miscommunication.

• It creates shared goals and clearer decision-making.

• It helps prevent relationship breakdown (yes, really).

• It builds financial confidence and reduces risk if something goes wrong.

If you’re the one who hasn’t been involved until now, that’s okay. There’s no shame in starting from where you are. And if you’ve been carrying the load, remember: transparency doesn’t mean giving up control—it means gaining support.

Where to Start in Joint Finances: Small, Intentional Conversations

This doesn’t need to be a big dramatic moment. In fact, we recommend the opposite:

• Keep it casual

• Be vulnerable

• Share the why, not just the what

• Suggest starting with one small area: budgeting, mortgage planning, or understanding your super

And remember, defensiveness is human. Especially if someone feels they’re being interrogated or judged. Approach the conversation with empathy—and a coffee.

Progress Over Perfection

A shared financial life isn’t about being perfect. It’s about moving in the same direction. Like any shared goal—fitness, parenting, building a business—you’ll wobble, get off track, and course-correct together.

Start small:

• One 30-minute chat a week

• Review your budget or map your cashflow

• Talk about future goals—retirement, holidays, security

• Celebrate small wins together

Because when both of you are across the money, the wins are sweeter, and the setbacks don’t feel as heavy.

Want to Go Deeper?

If this resonates, give the episode a listen. We dig into:

• Why “The No Person” role develops

• Childhood money stories and how they shape us

• How to make financial conversations feel safer, not scarier

• Why shared knowledge = shared strength

🎧 Listen to Episode 1: “How Sharing Finances Can Strengthen Your Relationship”

Or search Weaving Gold on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen.